Small bites.

One of my dearest called the other day after I didn’t respond to like 5 of her texts.  She was worried I was floating somewhere in the Pacific.  Nope, I’m here.  I’d love to tell you I was on another vacation, but that isn’t until next week, and Im not even sure I have time for it.  None the less, I am as alive as ever and handling the rapid fire from the life firing squad like a boss. Life is like that. It likes to give you reminders that your mom wasnt making shit up when she told you not to stick your finger in the hole in your sweater, because it would get bigger, or not to pick your scab because it would scar.  I sit here and say this with a hole in my leggings and giant scar on my knee from 6th grade. I wont tell you that I don’t have moments when driving home from one thing or another and think about pulling into the cliffs parking lot to watch people surf, and forget who I am, but I havent gotten to that level of cray yet.  I miss things like Parker snuggles, and lunch dates but I know they will come back, just as soon as I take over the world.

I am currently running on like 5 minutes (over the last week) of sleep and only one cup of coffee, and it was from a Kurig, so technically it only counts as like 1/4 of a real cup.  Seriously what is it with these machines, fill the damn cup! Moving on, I think the saying is, “spreading myself too thin” but I refuse to accept that as actuality.  I am up to 2 days a week in classes, 4 hours a week at fieldwork, 2 days watching the kiddos and 2 day at the hospital, and like maybe 20 minutes a week of hubby time, oh and Orangetheory butt kickin’ 3 days a week. I’d like to sleep now, but I guess ill do it later.  In the last 3 weeks Gypsy has been to the vet no less than 27 times and she still wears a plastic crown that is less than sparkly.  Call me gun-shy but I’m not thinking out next pet will be getting “fixed” because this time around they seemed to have broken her.  Everytime I tun around someone else I love has cancer and I getting pretty tired of that too.  If I go miss again, call Olivia Pope, Sean and I are probably in the sun with her and Jake, living under an alias.

I keep getting told to slow down, but its turning into the same as getting told to behave.  (Talk about a trigger word) Don’t tell me what to do.  I am stupid busy, but I’m thriving.  Why should I slow down? So I can sit on the couch and watch SVU?  Yes, I do love those days but you give me shit for that too so, I’m taking the win and not going to let you be the boss of me.  Im Bossy and I like it.  Why can’t I have 3 totally different dreams from 5 different ends of one spectrum? My wedding was a cake mix why can’t my life be?  Keep on, keepin’ on.  I may or may not know what day it is, but my grades are good, I am really good at my jobs, im killin’ it at life and I must say, I am a stellar wife.  I was always “Team Kristin” in high school and I’ve gotta give it to her, she balances in heels like a champ, so i’m trying to walk down the aisle in her shoes.  (literally and figuratively, have you seen her new chinese Laundry line? Amaze)

Lately life has been one big box of chocolates, that I can’t eat.  I started down the keto rabbit home and ive gotten lost somewhere between the almond butter aisle and where they keep the coconut oil.  It has been really hard breaking off my love affair with pizza, but ive dropped 6 lbs and don’t mind getting to gorge on cheese and filet as much as I want.   I know, you’re going to tell me that keto isnt long-term and the minute I eat a cookie im going to gain back double what I lose.  Again, dont tell me what to do. Go ahead and enjoy your pizza when I post a photo in a thong this summer, somewhere on a beach in the south of France.  I’ll give you all the advice you want, but apply it to your own life.  It’s the only way we are going to make it. Like I tell Rae at the dinner table, worry about yourself and your own plate, I can see Bri too.  I got this.  I promise I’m not yelling at you, but some times we all need a little tough love.  Just “be yourseeeeeeelf, be your seeeeeeelf”, and dont worry about the girl in the car next to you.

I’ve got to go, there is a toddler crying, a timer going off, an assignement due, a patient who needs help up and Sean is calling.  Chat soon.

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